On being Online

I’m back Online! That is to say, I’ve returned recently to the Social Internet. Now I’m no stranger to the Social Internet. For the most formative years of my life, I would even go so far as to say I was Chronically Online. I was on Facebook from my middle school’s computer lab, I can recognize different tumblr years from the shade of blue, and I’m pretty sure at some point I even had a MySpace. Then, in time, it became uncool in my social circles irl to be involved in the Social Internet, so bit by bit I stopped. The deeper into adulthood I went, the more accounts I shut down until, essentially, I had left altogether.

Cut to mid-to-late 2025: I’m in a new place, new job, new circles, and trying to make new friends. I started noticing that instead of asking for my number/WhatsApp people had started asking me for my Insta. For a few months, I shook my head in mock sorrow (and real smugness) and replied “I’m not on Instagram.” Sometimes I’d follow it up with offering my number instead (not the same; don’t do that). Sometimes people would go through LinkedIn to keep in touch. LinkedIn.

Anyways, I finally caved and got an Insta. And boy howdy has it been interesting to be back Online. The Online today is far more professional than it was last time I was here. The cinematography, the angles, the hooks, the editing, the keywords… it’s quality stuff. There’s also far more rules: how you interact with whose posts, or stories, and what it means when you do… there’s a system to it. There’s an Etiquette of the Online. It’s fascinating! I’ve been absorbing it all like an anthropologist dropped into a layered and complex new society.

From time to time, though, something reminds me that I’m not an external observer, I’m an active participant in the Online now. As such these norms and rules are applied to me as well. And I gotta tell you, as a veteran of the Skeleton Wars (iykyk), that just grinds my gears. Recently, I found myself deliberating for a solid few minutes which picture of a ferris wheel to include in a post about my latest trip… I almost had to put myself in time out. Just a few months back and I’m already acting like I need to curate my feed to my Audience. What Audience I thought I was performing for is beyond me.

You see¹ the high production value of the Online has an unfortunate but not unexpected side-effect: people are afraid to post low production things. The de-gremlinization² of the Online, I feel, has made more stressful and less fun. More ad-generating concepts, fewer vibes thrown into the void. More beautifully curated morning routines, fewer random pictures of your friends’ coffee. Do I want to see random pictures of my friends’ coffee? Maybe?!

There is no conclusion to this train of thoughts. Re-wilding the Social Internet³, might be fun, that’s all. Perhaps I’ll be the change, etc.

Footnotes